grooming fert

people suck a whole lot compared to fert. If people were more like ferrets i think i would get along with everyone a whole lot better.

My mom is yelling at me and being stupid. this whole stupid vacation idea is crap and i hate it, i dont want to go with my familiy right now. All i want to do is sleep and ignore everything. mostly sleep though. and smoke. Lots of smoking. my life feels like it is fake right now. I dont feel at home with anything I'm doing. it makes me want to just run away and forget i was ever in my situation. if there is anything more i want, its nothing i cna conciously think of right now. My school schedule is fun this fall.
1 ANTH-102-04 (024516) Cultural Anthropology 7 7203 LEC MWF 01:00PM 01:50PM K. Amherd 3.00
2 PE-360A3-01 (025499) Beginning Badminton 9 GYM LAB MWF 11:00AM 11:50AM J. Peterson 1.00
3 ENGL-101A-23 (024921) Reading & Written Composition 2 2207 LEC MW 02:00PM 03:15PM
J. Hurley 4.00
4 PHIL-110-01 (025539) Intro to Asian Religions 3 3101 LEC MWF 10:00AM 10:50AM J. Van Vleet 3.00

and i'm going to pick out one more one unit class to bring me up to an even 12.00 which is something i've been fighting tooth and nail over with mom. She doesnt think i can do anything. she is always holding me back, it seems no matter what or how well i do. To have a mother who has no faith in me is hard a lot of the time. She told me i could never get another job, last semester she told me that i would never get good grades doing school and work but hell, i still have my 4.000 gpa and i often remind her of that. i like having my days full. I dont want to sit at home with her reiterating how i am useless, dont do anything to help, smell and cant and wont suceed at life in general unless i follow her plan. She is even trying to get me to give up the flute, the only instrument i have ever been able to naturally play well. I dont know what to do about her sometimes. its stupid and i hate feeling how she makes me feel. If i didnt know better, i would say she hates me more than any other one person.