Current Music: Teleprompters - The Uncluded
It is in my control how I feel.
I can feel my sadness in small amounts. Spread it out over time. I don't need to be hateful to accept loss.
Middle grounds are not where a middle child with middling skills can live for a moderate amount of time. For a small stretch, I can make this work.
I am always fine. I will be good. There is a huge amount of good in my life. I am extremely satisfied with many of my choices and I will continue to congratulate myself on my successes.
I was falling in love and it is better than it ended before I said as much. I would have done anything to make our life better and it wasn't our life I was in. It was my life and his life. Mine was better for having him but the inverse was not true. I was selfish and only taking care of me because his life was broken and incomplete. Maybe it will always be. Maybe he'll feel complete enough to share with me someday. I'm not holding any breath.
I'm mourning the loss from my life. I had someone to share intimacy with and it felt good. I would like for his life to be good for him.
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