Ah, I saw the latest Schuby production called The Whiteness Project. Just more great stuff from my favorite white boy. The rest of his videos are at his schubtacular website. Okay, first day today. I have so many weird classes. I just don't understand how i can have NO classes with Ashley OR Heather. And how the T.A. for my Bio class has to be Pieter. Oh, fun but scary. The teacher is cool. He scared me once. I thought he was an assasian elf sent to kill me. Long story but true. okay, I now know that I like David more than he likes me. This revalation is quite sad, but I think it to be true. When he is close I can't stop from kissing him. But he can stop. And he often does. I guess he might just care what other people think more than I do. I personally could not care less what the pop culture nation of our schools thinks of me. I don't think less of those who do care. That is who they are and I respect that. I personally don't. Like my choice of what to eat. I don't eat meat but I'm not going to stop my friends. Either way, if he doesn't want to, it sucks to be me. Kissing is one of those mutual things. We both kinda have to want to. Damn, crazy ass teachers. And my US History teacher is a jock. Total jock. He took all the varsity team football players aside to talk to 'em. I hate that bias. And right from the start too. He could barely read. Monosyllabic, all the way. And Grant is in my class. Somebody shoot me now. In the temple. I held a knife to my wrist the other day. I didn't do anything. I thought of how I had what I wanted now. I had my friends and I had David and Heather and Ashley. Then I pressed th knife harder and thought of how I am loved. Harder and how I can blog. Harder and how I could not make myself happy by using other people for my whole life. Stopped with the knife and slashed all the Nike symbols from my backpack. I only missed one of the swooshes. Damn, i know i cant always rely on others to make me feel better. I realized this before. Now, I just need to live like I know this. Far too much of my mood id dependant on how things turn out during the day. I would rather be always melancholy than be extremes all of the time because I don't control it.
This was written last night but Mother powered down the router before I could post it. Sorry about the confusion, kids. Now I need to go get clothes on me and get myself to school for another exciting day as Krista-who-wishes-she-was-asian-or-black-or-half-of-each-like-Tiger-is. Should be exilarating.