Good night to all. I am going to bed and thought I would make a post to say that, thinking that by writing the post I could procrastinate my falling to sleep. Having started my post with nothing to say, I wonder where this will go, seeing as I am totally aimless here. Hey, I just found out something. You all know about the "comment" from David right? If not read my old posts. Either way, I asked him today what he really thought of me. Appearently, not much. I was a little dissapointed. But then you know I can't expect him to be like Ashley and tell me everything he feels about me. Not that either are really that great, but in this situation, I really would have perferred the "Ashley" approach from david. Of course I said something sarcastic about the lack of comment and, predictably, he delveld into self-pity. I really want to help him with that, but I don't know how. And it sucks to watch a friend do that to themselves and to you. I mean, I know it sounds selfish but, I don't like talking with someone who is doing that type of shizzy. I guess it is to be expected though, I mean he had a shitty relationship. And that fat whore used him. So strange.... what if Ashley is right? What if I have a crush on him? Huh? I can't even stand the thought. I mean he obviously has no respect for me. I mean, otherwise, how could he have said anything like that to me? Eh. And I thought he was nice. Eh. I guess not so much. I never wanted to be "with" him, I don't think. I have too goddamned much going on right now. And he is so mean. Seriously. He wrote me a testimonial and he said I was the mean one, but now that I think about it, he is actually really mean. He made me sorta cry. After he said that shit to me, I cried about it. Not then of course, I was too mad, but later, I cried. He hurt me that much with one poorly constructed statement. How thick-skulled am I? Please don't answer that. I doubt I will like the response. I have now succesfully deprressed myself further. Jesus. I always steer my convo's to something that makes me unhappy. That is why I have such a sad blog, I do it on semi-accident. Maybe I should change the template again. Something black and gloomy. Like the abuse one. It shows a wierd, blurry, suggestive shape and it says something along the lines of, use me, abuse me. Very Nirvana, if I do say so. And very fitting to how I feel. But then I didn't make that one, so the fun would be all gone. "I think I got alot of friends but I don't hear from them. What's another night all alone, when you're spending everyday on your own." Yeah I know the band is extremly poppy and mainstream, but if you listen only to obscure artists, you are just as limited as the kid who relies solely on TRL to bring him new music. So what, yeah most of the artists I listen to are easily recognizable, who gives a fuck? I don't judge my taste on how underground a band is. If i did, I would be just as close minded as you. I don't do trends, but they influence the shit around me. I have Britney Spears first CD. But it was Annie who bought the second one. She was ruled by the trend. She, Britney, wasn't great so why buy a second cd? Annie did, because it was the cool thing. Fucking loser. She still does the same thing, in every aspect of her life. Retard, living as someone who doesn't exist. She is trying to make some sort of a Old-Navy/Hot Topic hybrid. It doesn't work. She looks like a refugee from In Living Color. So pathetic. And she is trying to become all moody. She doesn't really pull it off well. And I still don't know what her talent is. I mean, for me and frankie, it was pretty damn obvious. He could draw and write and i could write then, later, draw somewhat. We both knew, really early, what we could do well. So far, from Annie, no sign of anything. Her story telling is abominable and she can't draw for shit. She can whine, but she can't say jack shit in front of an audience, nor a telephone. She can sorta type faster than me, which isn't saying much. But no discernable talent. Nothing, nada, nil, sans talent. LOL, okay, my cat just sorta tried to roll over, to get my attention from the computer screen, then she fell off the bed, a la Clueless! Hahahaha. I love that cat, even though i don't really like her. I didn't want a cat, Annie did. Why am I taking care of it? I don't like cats for the most part. I am much more of a dog person. Dogs are cool. They will chase shit you throw at them. Throw something at a cat and suffer the wrath of claws. Evil bastards, the whole lot of them. Well, now I am really tired. So, wrapping this up, the world is a strange place, and this is why I don't know what to do about David. Yeah that about sums up everything important about this blog. Hopefully my little bug in publishing will be gone. Hopefully. I think my blog is becoming way too important to me. Night.